7.28.2014

on motherhood


I'd heard her say it many times throughout my childhood, but as my firstborn son nestled in my arms, my ears heard my mother with new clarity.

"A mother's job is to advocate for her child"

I knew it then, that I would, as my mother before me and hers before that, that I would fight for my babies. That I'd be their voice when they couldn't speak. I've blogged about this before, but what I didn't realize is that it doesn't get easier.


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A few weeks ago, I took Elsie in for her regular 15 month appointment at the office we've been visiting for the past eight months. I won't get too much into the details of what happened, but something I feel very strongly about as my children's mother was absolutely violated in an extremely harsh and unprofessional way. A nurse yanked on my daughter's legs to try to remove her from my arms. She pulled hard. I felt like those two women in the Judgement of Solomon, fighting over a baby, because clearly there was no kindness or love coming from this woman.
 Timid Elsie is frightened of almost everything (the garage door opening unexpectedly, brother growling in her face, and oh! strangers!), so take a moment to imagine her absolute terror in an unfamiliar environment while a strange woman harshly tries to remove her from her mother's arms. over protocol.
I don't think I have been filled with that much fury, um, ever. I left shaking and sobbing with anger over the treatment of my baby, and after I'd cried to my mother and my husband and my sister in law (and calmed down an appropriate amount), I called the doctor and told him what I needed remedied or we'd be leaving his practice. I was emotionally drained for the better part of a week after this incident.

 But my point is this:
That's my job. It is a hard one and it goes against every bit of my natural disposition but it is absolutely my job to argue and defend what I know is best for my children. It is what I signed up for. I know them intimately. I know their needs, their fears, and how to best comfort them. They have no voice but mine, and I will never fail to raise it in their honor.

Because I am their advocate.
And I know that Christ suffered, and bled and died so that He could Advocate my cause to the Father. And whether you believe in that or not, the only thing I know that emulates that on a smaller scale is motherhood. Mothers suffer and bleed and skirt by death during childbirth and what a powerful, incredible thing that is. We suffer and bleed and a fierce protectiveness is born in our hearts as our children exit our wombs. It becomes our sacred duty to raise and nurture, to clothe and feed, and to be their advocate because who else will? No earthly being knows my children as I do and the responsibility of that rests squarely on my shoulders. I am their mother and I am their advocate, forever and ever.

2 comments:

  1. Whoa. That is totally infuriating! Where do they get off thinking that is EVER okay to do? Elodie is the exact same way. Very timid and freaks out over loud sounds and strangers. Our doctor's appointments are really hard... If a nurse treated her that way... oh my goodness. I loved your blog post on standing up for your kids. It really hit home for me before I had Elodie and I've thought of it often whenever I've felt the need to speak up in situations where my opinion isn't the professional expert one. So thanks for writing these experiences!

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  2. I'm already so outspoken, I can't imagine how I would have reacted. Good job for calling and talking to the doctor later, that must have been a scary thing to do (or maybe just for me because I HATE phone calls)

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